066 When You Think You’ve Tried Everything

Do you ever feel like, “I have tried everything and it’s just not working”? Have you ever caught yourself saying those exact words or something similar? Maybe you’ve said things like, “I have tried everything. I have been busting my ass. I have been working so hard.” You have taken every course, you have hired every consultant, you have read every book, you have spent countless hours crafting social media posts.

You have been busy, busy, busy, but still for whatever reason you haven’t been able to accomplish your goal. You haven’t been able to find enough clients. You haven’t been able to secure the kinds of opportunities you want. You haven’t been able to generate the amount of money you want and you can’t figure out why. This episode is dedicated to anyone who feels like they are doing all the things, but not getting the results. If that’s you, keep listening because I have some thoughts for you. I have a really inspiring story that I want you to hear and I have some tough love for you, too.

Look, sometimes your business coach, your employees, even your closest friends can see something that you’re not seeing, a blind spot of yours. But they’re too timid or polite to give you the tough love that you need. I am not timid nor am I interested in being polite. What I am interested in is helping you win. I want you to succeed. I want you to earn more money, build wealth, and have a rich life, a life that’s rich in money and rich in time, energy, power, and all the good things you want.

So, on this show I will always give it to you straight which sometimes means saying things you don’t necessarily want to hear. Keep listening because this episode just might change your life.

Welcome to the Hello Seven Podcast. I'm your host, Rachel Rodgers, wife, mother of four children, a lover of Beyoncé, coffee drinker, and afro-wearer, and I just happen to be the CEO of a seven-figure business. I am on a mission to help every woman I meet become a millionaire. If you want to make more money, you are in the right place. Let's get it going.

I want to kick us off today with a true story. Are you familiar with a man named Leslie Odom Jr.? Some of you might be nodding and screaming, “Yes, I love him,” and some might be like, “Who?” Leslie is an actor and singer. He has released three solo albums, he’s been in numerous TV shows and movies, and he has performed on Broadway. He is most famous for originating the role of Aaron Burr in a little musical called Hamilton. You know, the most successful musical of all-time.

For his work in Hamilton he won a Tony award and a Grammy award. He also happens to be a black man from Queens. Hey, shoutout to Queens! I’m from Queens, too, if you didn’t know, now you know. Leslie is a king from Queens, so represent. Leslie wrote a book called Falling Up: How to Take Risks, Aim Higher, and Never Stop Learning. This book is kind of like  a hybrid of a memoir and a motivational sermon. Everyone, go read it. This book is a must-read for anyone with a big, ambitious dream. Whether your dream is making a million dollars or solving global warming or getting to Broadway you gain so much from this book.

In his book Leslie talks about a time in his career when he was really stuck, creatively stuck, financially stuck as well. This was the pre-Hamilton ­era of his life. Leslie had achieved a modest of success as an actor, but he had fallen into a rut. He felt bored and frustrated and was struggling to find exciting work and generate a steady income. So, Leslie spoke to one of his mentors and he said, “I think I’m done. I’m done trying to be a performing artist. It’s too hard. It’s too competitive. It’s just not working out for me. I think I need to figure out my Plan B and do something different with my career.”

His mentor listened and then his mentor said, “Okay, Leslie, if you genuinely want to quit acting and switch to a different career you can do that. I support you and we can figure out a transition plan to help you do that.” Then his mentor added, “But before you quit, I’d love to see you try.”

Can we just take a moment to laugh at this? I am obsessed. “Before you quit, I’d love to see you try.” Leslie was confused. He says to his mentor, “You’d love to see me try? What do you mean? I have been trying, okay? I’ve been trying for literal years, what are you talking about?” Leslie rattled off how hard he’d been trying to make it as a performer and how hard it is out there, how tired he was, and so on and so forth.

But his mentor could see through the bullshit and he was not having it. On that fateful day his mentor gave him some tough love and he said, “Leslie, you sit on your couch and you wait for the phone to ring. When the phone rings you show up and you do a great job, but the phone didn’t ring today, so what did you do for yourself today? Did you read anything? Did you write anything? Did you practice? Did you prepare? Did you email anybody? Do people know that you’re out of work?”

Basically, Leslie’s mentor read him for filth and pointed out, “You say you are trying to achieve your dream, but are you trying? Really? Like, really, really? Or are you sitting there complaining and throwing yourself a pity party and waiting for the phone to ring?” This was a startling moment for Leslie.

At first, he was irritated and even a little offended. But pretty soon he realized that his mentor was right, he hadn’t really been trying to achieve his professional goals. He’d been coasting. He’d been playing it safe. He’d been parked on the couch at home waiting for someone to email or call. He’d been passively waiting for opportunities to land in his lap instead of creating opportunities for himself. Leslie’s life changed on that day.

He decided, “Okay, before I quit my dream of being a super successful artist, before I give up, I’m going to actually try.” Not too long after that Leslie got cast in the musical Hamilton in a leading role and the rest is history. There’s such a powerful message here and it’s a message that applies to anyone who’s got a big goal regardless of what industry you’re in. Before you give up, how about you actually try? Really try. Bring your absolute best effort. Bring 100% commitment. Bring all of your courage. Be an active generator of the resources you want instead of passively waiting. Try that then see what happens.

Over the last 10 years I’ve had numerous clients tell me, “Rachel, I have tried everything to grow my business. I have tried everything to find more customers. I have tried everything to make more money, but it is just not working.” These clients insist that they have tried everything, Everything, capital E.

Okay, that’s what you insist, but let’s look at the evidence. Show me the receipts. Did you email 10 potential clients in the last week and personally invite them to hire you? Yes or no? Did you circle back to five previous clients and ask them to hire you again or not? Did you reach out to five colleagues to let them know what you’re working on these days and ask them to refer customers to you? Did you spend time honing your craft and sharpening your skills and becoming the best service provider you can be?

In the last week, did you do something to generate resources for yourself? Did you do an action step to generate money, generate time, or generate an opportunity for yourself? Did you do something terrifying in the last week? Did you take a risk? Did you put yourself out there in a way that feels new and uncomfortable? Did you do all of those things? Yes or no?

If so, congratulations, that means you are trying, really trying. You are doing the brave work that leads to success and you will succeed. It’s not a matter of if, just when. If you did not do all of those things then you are not really trying. That might be tough to hear, but it is the truth, my friend. You are behaving like the out of work actor who’s sitting on the couch waiting for the phone to ring. You are hiding, being passive, and avoiding what needs to be done.

You may be thinking, “But, Rachel, I’m so busy all the time. It’s not like I’m just sitting here eating Cinnabons and watching The Real Housewives. I’m doing stuff.” Okay, sure. I believe you, perhaps you are very busy. Every workday you are frittering away your time doing something, but you are not focused on the right things. If I had to guess I would say you are keeping yourself very occupied doing lots and lots of busy work, but you are avoiding the things that really are risky and are uncomfortable. Those are the things that make a real difference.

Also, you may be having a moment of delusion. You may feel like you have completed hundreds of courageous action steps, but in reality, you have done almost zero steps. Your feelings do not match reality. You may be suffering from a bout of entrepreneurial delusion. It reminds me of the time my friend, Susan Hyatt had to give some tough love to her daughter. Cora was in high school at the time and she wanted to produce a play at school, but Cora was struggling to convince students to be in the play. She needed at least 15 cast members and people just weren’t signing up.

The deadline was approaching and Cora started to feel really discouraged. If she couldn’t convince enough students to participate then the play would be cancelled. Cora sat down with Susan and said, “Mom, I have asked everyone to be in the play. Everyone.” And her mom goes, “You’ve asked everyone, huh? Okay, who is everyone? How many people did you actually ask? Give me a number.” And Cora goes, “I’ve asked 10 people.” To which her mom replies, “Okay, honey, 10 people is a great start, but 10 people is not everyone, not even close. There are thousands of kids at your school and in our community. Keep asking. Send some emails. Make some flyers. Text, post on social media, talk to kids at school, contact some local theater departments at other schools. Bust a move. You’ve got work to do.”

Have you ever been the Cora or the Leslie in this situation? I bet you have. I know I have. Many times, grown ass women get stuck in the same line of thinking. You are trying to convince 20 clients to enroll in your program or you’re trying to reach 500K in annual revenue or you are trying to find an investor or get a grant and you go, “Ugh, it’s not happening, but I’ve asked everyone. I have tried everything. Woe is me. Life is so hard.”

But if you take a step back and look at the facts, it’s like, “No, ma’am, you haven’t asked everyone. You sent three emails and then you gave up.” I’m sorry, I just cannot not laugh at that. Three emails is not everyone. Three emails is barely anyone, right? You’re just scratching the surface. You’ve only just begun. Feeling overwhelmed and discouraged is not the same thing as actually trying. Pretty much everyone is susceptible to the mental trap that sounds like, “I have tried everything, poor me. I have tried all the things and none of it’s working,” right?

I have fallen into this trap, too. Over the years I’ve had moments where I needed more clients and I didn’t know what I was going to do to get them, and maybe I sent out an email or two, maybe I posted on social media, and I was like, “Well, no one’s coming to me, so I don’t know, should I just give up?” I had coaches and mentors and friends and my husband who would be like, “Are you fucking kidding me right now? You call that trying?” They would give me that tough love that I’m giving you right now.

I remember one particular instance when I launched my first mastermind and I put it out there. So many people had been asking me to coach them and so I thought a mastermind, people will love it, people will jump on it and I’ll get these eight spots filled no problem. It’ll take two minutes. So, I created a fancy sales page and I sent out a couple emails and I was like, “There you go, my big announcement. Let the sales fly. Let all the people come in.” And guess what, they didn’t all come in. I had some people come in and I had some people join the mastermind, but I didn’t have enough people.

So, I learned how to do spearfishing where I started reaching out individually to every person who I thought was a great potential client, every person who I thought was a great fit for this program and I talked to all of them and I sent emails and I followed up and I hustled my little heart out. I got off of my couch and instead of waiting for people to email me back for my newsletter announcement I started talking about it everywhere I went. I tried to get on podcasts. I did webinars. I started doing information sessions. I did a bonus call just to learn more about the program and to coach people in real-time so they can see me in action. I did a bunch more activity than I thought was required.

What I had planned to do marketing-wise to get those clients was 10% of what was actually required to get those clients. That’s what happens. It’s not going to happen by you sitting around, being lazy about it, and talking about woe is me, it’s so hard. This is the difference between the people who have wildly, insanely, amazing success and those who don’t.

One more story. Back when I was originally launching Hello Seven several years ago, I had a big event and at this event I was going to announce my new program called Million-Dollar Badass, it was a mastermind. So, I had an event happening. It was connected to a course that I had launched and I probably had like 30 people signed up, but the venue fit 80 and I wanted 80 people. I wanted as many people as possible to be there to experience the magic that I had planned. I had gotten an event planner. I got an expensive and stunning venue. We had all kinds of entertainment and activities built-in and I really wanted to have the max amount of people there.

So, I went to a friend and copywriter and Emma Pattee who’s been on this podcast and I said to her, I was like, “We don’t have enough people signed up. I don’t know what to do. Should I just cancel? Because if we have so few people, I’ve spent so much money on this event like am I just throwing good money after bad? Maybe I should quit.” Emma said to me, “I don’t feel like we really tried to sell all those tickets yet.” She was like, “Yeah, we sent a couple emails, we sent some reminders, we’ve talked about it a little, but we haven’t really gone all-in on selling.”

She said, “Let’s spend a week just talking about this event, talking about the speakers, talking about some of the awesome sessions, talking about the dance party you’re throwing. Let’s really go all-in and send an email every single day for a week and tell people everything they need to know to really feel like this is worth it. Give them all the travel info. Tell them the kinds of people that are coming. Tell them everything that they need to know.”

So, that’s what we did. We created a week’s worth of emails. I create a new sales page with new information and I did Facebook Lives and talked to individual people and did everything that I possibly could to get butts in seats and get these tickets sold, to really get the word out. We also created a VIP version of the ticket. So, for folks who didn’t want to have to plan all their travel and they were confused about where should I stay? How long should I stay? What’s the transportation going to be like? There was so much uncertainty of coming to a new place and so we took all of the uncertainty out and created a VIP package for those who wanted to not have to worry about booking travel.

So, we packaged that all together and we put it out there, educated people, gave them a deadline, and just gave it everything that we got and would not shut up about it and talk to every single person we could and just talked and talked and talked, sent messages, hosted webinars, did everything humanly possible to get people to this event. By the end of the week we had 80 seats sold. We sold an additional 50 seats in just a week because we actually tried.

Sometimes you think you’re trying and you are really not. You are really dialing it in. Here’s the thing, here’s what happens when you really try, the momentum that you build from going all-in, it creates magic. Here’s what happened, 80 people signed up and then they asked to bring friends and other people wind up coming, so we wound up having over 80 people. We had to bring in another table just to seat all of the additional people that came.

The energy in the room was palpable. People were excited and ready and feeling expectant. They were open to receiving what I had to share with them and the event was beautiful. It went on for three days. We had dance parties, we did archery together, we did painting, there was a cooking lesson, we did axe throwing. There was so much going on it was so much fun. We had incredible speakers on the stage and people were yelling. It felt like church. I loved every minute.

On the final day I made the big announcement about my brand new offer which was my Million-Dollar Badass mastermind and everyone in the room was on the edge of their chair listening to the details of this offer and we wound up having 18 people sign up for the program at that event. A quarter of the room, practically. So, I started my mastermind with a huge amount of people and on day one of delivering this mastermind I had over 30 people in this program and it was a super success.

Why did that happen? Why did so many people sign up? Why did I wind up having 30 people when we actually started? All of that happened because of the work that I was willing to put in to sell those tickets. When you start putting in work you’re not just putting in that work for the ticket sales, that work is going to pay dividends that will continue to deliver returns after the event is over, after the ticket sales are done. More momentum will follow that. More magic will happen.

Over the next year I signed up probably another 30 to 40 people into that mastermind. Many of whom had attended the event or heard about the event, saw the photos, saw the stories coming out of that event and became interested in my work. So, this is what happens when you really try. You really create the kind of momentum that you need.

So, here’s the main thing I want you to take away from this episode. There are moments in life when you feel tired. You are worn out, you are weary, you feel like you have been trying so hard to achieve your goal and it’s not happening and you feel discouraged. In that moment you might catch yourself saying something like, “I have tried everything,” and you may want to walk away from your vision and just give up. I want you to remember that story I told you about Leslie Odom Jr. and his mentor.

Just like Leslie, you might feel like you are trying so hard, but in reality, you may not be trying at all. You’re probably not trying anywhere near as fiercely as you think. You might be giving your goal 10% effort, 10% courage, and really half-assing the whole thing. So, before you give up on your beautiful goal, how about you actually try?

Trying means that every week you do something that makes you uncomfortable. Trying means that you ask people to hire you, ask people for their business, put yourself out there, ask for the money. Trying means that you are generating the opportunities you want instead of waiting for things to magically fall in your lap. Trying means doing that one thing you have been avoiding, that thing that you keep postponing and tap dancing around and procrastinating on. Yes, that one. That’s what trying means.

So, I would love to see you try. If you are tired, rest. Replenish yourself, rest whenever you need to, but don’t quit. I want to be very clear when I say you need to try. This does not mean work yourself to the bone and never rest. Absolutely not. Trying includes rest. Trying includes vacation time. Trying includes self-care. You can take excellent care of yourself and do the things that make you feel healthy and powerful and you can try.

You can do the actual work that moves the needle rather than the busy work that keeps you busy and keeps you safe from the risks you need to take to see the results that you want. Maybe you want to launch your first company or launch a new offer or launch your first book into the world. Or you want to generate an extra burst of cash and use that money to buy a house or get a tutor for your kids or whatever you desire.

Think about your goal and consider these questions. What’s it going to take to make it happen? What steps do you need to take? What steps have you been avoiding? What does kind of trying look like and what does really trying look like? Make sure that you are doing the really trying because I guarantee if you really try for even just 40 or 50 days your life will change, your business will change. You will start generating a lot more money. You will feel momentum building. That’s the power of being all-in.

I know what it feels like to be halfway-in, semi-committed. I’ve done that and I know what it feels like to be all-in and let me tell you, I’ve done that, too. All-in is way more fun, meaningful, and profitable. To bring this episode full circle I will leave you with these final words from Leslie Odom Jr. himself. “What did you do on your own behalf today? Did you do anything other than wait? Did you call anyone? Did you send an email? Did you take one step towards something that makes you come alive today? If you’re willing to take one humble and meaningful step toward making a dream come true the universe will take two.” And that is what we call a word. You know what you need to do, go try like you have never tried before.

Are you a member of We Should All Be Millionaires the club? I hope you are because in this club we have one goal only and that is to help you make more money. We give you the best training on Earth, coaching to help you stay committed and focused, and we make the journey fun, inspiring, and empowering.

Whether you are self-employed or not, regardless of your industry or profession, this club will show you money making possibilities that you had not considered before. We will expand your mind and your wallet, too. To see all the details about the club and all the perks you get when you join go to helloseven.co/club. You can join any time. You can leave any time. There is no long-term commitment. Get in there and we will see you in the club.