“I’ve tried everything and none of it is working”

You're probably reading this article because you’ve said these words before: “I’ve tried everything and none of it is working.”

When you said them you were probably feeling pretty bad about what was happening in your business. These words might have even been accompanied by tears. Heck, you might be feeling this way right now.

As a business coach, I can’t tell you the number of coaching sessions I’ve done that have started with these exact words. One of my clients gets on the call feeling totally exasperated and sad because she’s done ALL the marketing things and still doesn’t have enough clients. She’s triggered, she’s sad, maybe she’s totally angry. When is her time gonna come, she wonders, as she throws her hands up in the air. It’s all very dramatic.

Don’t feel bad. I’ve been that drama Queen.

When one of my clients makes a dramatic statement like this, I like to start with some fact-checking.

Let’s begin by actually assessing exactly what’s not working. So I ask questions like:

  • How many blog posts did you write?
  • How many social media posts did you create?
  • How many Facebook or Instagram Lives did you do?
  • How many videos did you create and share?
  • How many webinars did you host?
  • How many challenges did you host?
  • How many emails did you send out?
  • In those pieces of content, how many times did you directly ask people to work with you? What was the engagement like in each of those pieces of content? Which ones got the best response?
  • How many pitches did you send out to podcasts and other forms of media?
  • How many pitches did you send out for public speaking opportunities?
  • How many old clients did you connect with one on one and ask them to work with you again?
  • How many new potential clients did you connect with one on one to ask them to work with you again?
  • How many times did you reach out to affiliate and referral sources?
  • How many FB and Instagram ads have you run?

I could go on, but I think you get the point. Every single time we actually run through this list, we discover that they have, in fact, not done Everything. Usually, they have done nowhere near Everything.

They may be keeping themselves very busy and they may feel like they’ve done everything but feelings aren’t facts. And just because you are busy doesn’t mean you are busy doing the things that will actually make your goals happen.

This “I’ve tried everything” feeling has nothing to do with Everything and has a ton to do with another E word: Entitlement.

Yep, when you indulge in this kind of thinking you are coming from a place of entitlement. You feel like you have worked so hard and you have earned the level of success you desire and the fact that it is not happening right motherfuggin now is an offensive slight against you. Here’s what’s wrong with this thinking: if you don’t currently have the level of success you desire then you absolutely have not done what’s necessary to obtain it (cause if you did, you’d have it). And these are facts, not feelings.

Here’s the thing I want you to know (the thing I had to learn as well): You are not entitled to success.

You are not entitled to a NY Times Bestselling book, you are not entitled to a waiting list of clients, you are not entitled to a million Instagram followers, an audience of 100,000 email subscribers, all the best press that would make your peers jealous and a net worth of one million dollars. You are not entitled to any of it.

The sooner you get past this notion of entitlement, the sooner you will actually make your next level of success happen. Entitled thinking comes from a victim mentality. You are not gonna produce your best work when you are acting like a victim of your circumstances. Instead you need to understand that it’s on you.

It’s on you to discover what gets your audience excited to work with you. It’s on you to figure out the right messaging. It’s on you to connect with them in a real, vulnerable and powerful way every single day. It’s on you to make things happen instead of waiting for your fairy godmother to come along and wave her magic wand over your career. It’s on you, my friend.

And this is wonderful news because this truth means that you have the power.

You have the power to make every single thing that you want to happen, happen. You have the power to build an audience of one million raving fans. You have the power to create a waiting list of potential clients. And you absolutely have the power to generate millions of dollars in sales. You. Have. The Power.

So fuck that victim, whiney bullshit. We’ve all been there. But let’s all make like Elsa and let it go in favor of stepping into our power and making Every Single Thing we want happen. You are the fairy godmother you've been waiting for.


PS – Whenever you’re ready, here are two ways to work with me and my team to step into your power and scale your business:

  1. Join the Million Dollar CEO Society, a curated Facebook group exclusively for women entrepreneurs making six-figures or more. Note, you must be earning at least $100k in annual revenue to join. Click here.
  2. Work with me and my team for 12 months, starting April 8th, to scale your six-figure business into a seven-figure business. Click here to book a call and apply to my Million Dollar Badass mastermind.
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